Sometimes, I get a little too tangled up in the desire for stuff. It’s everywhere, online and on TV and in my house and car and when I go to the store. And sometimes, I think I need stuff. More, that is. More yarn or a new TV or computer or those 1600 thread count Egyptian cotton sheets for a great price I saw somewhere. Don’t get me wrong–I’m not anti-stuff. I am anti-too-much-stuff or what-the-hell-was-I-thinking-when-I-bought-that or buying stuff for the sake of that brief momentary thrill of having bought something that’s going to land on the floor or in the closet or a drawer never to be used.
I’ve been obsessing a little bit the last couple of days over some yarn that’s pretty dang nice–I got to pet a skein or two the other day and admire the colors–and it’s on closeout at WEBS, one of my favorite yarn pimps. The girls in one of my knitting groups often do group orders at WEBS and are getting together another one now, which saves us all money on shipping and such, even though we’re still spending money. It’s that old “the more you spend, the more you save” way of thinking. You’re still spending money, so you’re not really saving anyway. Anyway, I’m mighty tempted by the price and the prettiness and the squishiness of this particular yarn. I’m also mighty tempted to buy another pair of square knitting needles, which are easier on my hands than the traditional round ones, but which are a bit spendy.
And then something like this lands in my in-box, something that smacks me right between the eyes, and I look around at all I have–a computer, two TVs, a phone, clothes, food, water, a car, more stuff than any one person needs–and I think, again, of all the people in the world who are struggling just for the basics.
Call me a bleeding heart, but it just kills me sometimes that even someone like me who lives close to the bone can have so much while others have so little. It ain’t right. It just ain’t right. And look, I know I can’t save the whole world. But I read something recently that helps ease that desire to save everyone and make it all right–“Do for one what you wish you could do for millions.” So I’m letting that take root and I’m doing for one or two or a dozen what I can’t do for millions.
I’m passing on the yarn. I think I can make better use of that money elsewhere.