Procrastinator, that is.
Isn’t it funny that the prefix could be taken to mean both approval and a level of mastery? The true etymology of the word doesn’t allow for those interpretations, but still—I approve and I’m a little too good at it.
That old witticism about never doing today what can be put off until tomorrow hits me right where I live. Take my work, for example. I’m lucky just to have a job. True, it’s not the most interesting work in the world, but then most work isn’t if you stop to think about it for a minute. I’m also lucky to be able to work at home, to more or less set my own schedule, and to work without supervision, yet I often find myself preferring to do other things than provide for my modest needs. What’s up with that? I have all month, every month, to complete a certain amount of work in order to keep my job, and yet the last few days have seen me scrambling to get it done by Wednesday. Dumb? Just a little.
I had been telling myself earlier in the month that I didn’t care if I lost my job, but that’s just crazy talk–really crazy. I do care, because as simple a life as I live, I still need money. Remember those lines from It’s a Wonderful Life, where Clarence tells George they don’t use money in heaven?
Oh, no, no.
We don’t use money in heaven.
Oh, that’s right, I keep forgetting.
Comes in pretty handy down here, bub.
Um, yeah. Blunt but true words, and you can bet I won’t be forgetting them next month.
This mad dash over the last few days has led me to think about other areas of my life where I’ve procrastinated—in getting my butt outside to get some exercise, in approaching difficult conversations, in making decisions about where I’m going to live and what kind of work I want to pursue. Hindsight being what it is, I sure wish I could hop in the wayback machine and go back to fix some of these things, but as Mr. F often said, you can wish in one hand and spit in the other and see which one fills up first. I can only take what I know, learn from past and sometimes bitter experience, and move ahead. That’s all anyone can do.
And just in case you’re wondering, I worked this morning and I’m on track to complete my tasks by Wednesday.